Relationships are a continuous dance of relating.
I do not like to box people into categories or label them,
but I found that in order to help people resonate with such an abstract message and point of view, using certain labels often helps others to connect better to the message.
Living in a very polarized world, naming, filing, and categorizing people and their behavior can make some people feel safe and secure as that is how the world currently manages a scary, unknown world.
One type of relationship is one between empaths and narcissists.
The characteristics of empaths and narcissists are important to understand because the interactions between these two levels of consciousness can create heartrending pain.
I would like to address this subject by first presenting some of the archetypal behaviors of these individuals that we may have experienced. Then we will look at how the two interact.
First, we have the narcissist, who is “...an extremely self-centered person with an exaggerated sense of self-importance”. They also exhibit exploitative behavior. Not surprisingly, narcissists have impaired relationships because they're unable to feel. They are only concerned with themselves, and they believe they deserve everything without having to work for it.
I was very intrigued to find similarities between the core behavior of the narcissist and the beautiful flower Narcissus, whose name comes from the Greek Narkissos.
But instead of referring to what we know today as the daffodil, it refers to a type of Iris or Lily associated with the Greek word narkē (see narcotic) because of the numbing effect of the plant’s alkaloid properties, similar to the narcissist who is “numb” to feeling.
On the other hand, we have empaths;
those “... who experience the emotions of others with deep empathy”.
They are humble and loving in contrast to the grandiose behavior of a narcissist. They feel people's pain and suffering in their own bodies without even knowing. You might say that they carry the pain and suffering of humanity.
The narcissist is magnetically attracted to loving and caring empaths.
An empath’s Belief System(BS) simply does not include the idea that there is “bad” in anyone. Empaths carry a very high level of consciousness, but they lack knowledge of the true polarized world. You might predict what happens to this relationship. After a while, relating with a narcissist is toxic, while the empath feels drained, often physically sick, and blamed for everything. That kind of relating can simmer for months or years before the truth is able to fully surface, and the empath leaves.
There is another kind of empath: the Empowered Empath (EE). This empath has been in the polarized world, has been hurt, has had their heart broken many times, has been devoured and yet is still able to sustain their deep unconditional love for humanity. This EE who has learned of the earthly games of manipulation and deception at the deepest level has become empowered by the knowledge and wisdom gained through their experience of suffering.
So what happens when a narcissist meets the Empowered Empath?
Well, the Empowered Empath (EE) has the ability to easily see through the narcissist’s behavior, lies, motives and intentions. The narcissist, on the other hand, can only see loving and caring energy due to their inability to feel. So they begin their usual dance of deception and manipulation.
The biggest fear of a narcissist is to be exposed in their games of manipulation and deception.
But that is exactly what the EE has no problem doing.
They have the ability to dissolve it just by looking at the situation with their eyes.
It is easy to see and call out the deception, bringing light and clarity to confusion.
Deception cannot thrive when it is exposed to the Light of Love from the EE.
The empowered empath (EE) effortlessly holds unconditional love for everyone which is super attractive to the narcissist. At the same time, the unconditional love consciousness, that the EE holds exposes that which is not aligned with love, in this case with deception, manipulation and lies.
The EE does not look for narcissists. These situations arise organically and are executed without conscious knowing. The EE’s consciousness does that without effort as if it is on autopilot.
This is who they ARE.
They simply ARE.
As this interaction plays out, the tactics of the narcissist might escalate to passive-aggressive behavior and or verbal abuse. These tactics are quite obvious to EEs and he/she responds with complete calm because they fully understand that it is simply a faulty program that runs in the narcissist. It is not at all personal because it is all about resonance and frequency.
EEs hold a very high level of emotional intelligence as they easily see people’s strengths and weaknesses. Their ability to do this makes them masters of their own emotional responses without getting triggered by blame, comments or attacks. And because they are essentially born natural healers, they know that narcissists carry deep shame, guilt, and rage as well as pain.
The only way to help a narcissist is for the EE to reveal their pain by bringing it to the light to be healed .
Often, the EE might look to others as “bad”. But as mentioned previously, the “bad” refers only to behavior. An EE may be very forthright in manner or exhibit ice cold mannerisms as they are quite capable of turning off their feelings, but only to protect themselves. They are, after all, light warriors going to battle. They are not concerned with other people’s judgment of them because they know who they are. And that makes them powerful! They can be neutral in a polarized world of conflict because of the unconditional love that they have. Their weapons are Love, Strength, Courage, Compassion and Wisdom.
These beautiful beings are often overlooked and misunderstood as they do not seek fame, money or recognition. Their true desire for themselves and for everyone is to be free to simply be, to seek truth, and share love.
With Love,
Lenka Schulze Ph.D